The 5-Minute-Manager - Interpersonal Skills

Daily stresses and the rush to get things done mean that we often fail to communicate clearly, diluting our ability to listen effectively and to influence and persuade.

There are eight interpersonal skills that have a big impact on people, and which can increase your management acumen. Being adept at these skills is an essential management quality that increases your social capital and promotes you as an understanding and supportive person. Here is an opportunity to quickly brush up on them to maintain an open and honest communication style.

1. Open Communication

Open communication means practising active listening and mutually beneficial honest communication. Active listening requires you to fully concentrate, understand, respond to and then remember what is being said to you. You need to make a conscious effort to hear and understand the complete message being spoken, rather than just passively hearing the message of the speaker, it means reading between the lines and using:

2. Conflict Management

Conflict is inevitable and needs to be managed constructively and professionally. When appropriately harnessed it can be a very positive thing. Did you know that a clash of ideas can be the beginning of innovative thinking whilst being overly dominant with your ideas; is selfish and diminishes thinking. You must learn how to settle and decide between competing ideas by using both conflict and competitive thinking to your advantage.

“In surveys of European and American executives, fully 85 per cent of them acknowledged that they had issues or concerns at work that they were afraid to raise. Afraid of the conflict that would provoke, afraid to get embroiled in arguments that they did not know how to manage and felt that they were bound to lose. So how do we develop the skills that we need? Because it does take skill and practice, too. If we aren't going to be afraid of conflict, we have to see it as thinking, and then we have to get really good at it”. Margaret Heffernan.

3. Trust

To build trust, the approach is to strike a balance between appearing as warm and competent so that you come across as credible and human. People are generally aware of your background, namely, the credentials that gained you your current position. With credibility established, it’s now time to demonstrate some vulnerability and show that you are indeed a fallible human being. The combination of competence and warmth makes you seem more trustworthy.

4. Respect

Experienced managers know that respect isn’t an entitlement linked to a job title, rather it is earned by:

· Leading by example.

· Being humble.

· Showing commitment every single day.

· Sharing your expectations of others.

· Helping people succeed and advance.

· Compromising.

5. Body Language

Nonverbal behaviour, or body language, is language, so you need to remind yourself that it is a form of communication. Your everyday body language is often what determines whether people like you or not, and when someone has made up their mind about you it’s all but impossible to change, therefore, body language must be made to work for you. Here are five common mistakes you need to avoid:

· Not having a firm handshake.

· Not meeting someone’s eyes.

· Fussy hand gestures.

· Crossing your arms.

· Nodding too much.

6. Persuasion

A primary management activity is the ability to persuade people to do things they either don’t want to, have an unreasonable fear of or think they will fail at. The key to persuasion is motivation, when delegating a task consider:

· Telling them that if you were doing the task this is how you would do it.

· Telling them that you are less interested in the outcome of the task but rather that they have a go.

· Talking about what they’ll lose if they don’t do the task.

7. Charisma

Charisma is believed to be an innate personality trait that cannot be learned, you either have it, or you don’t. However, a manager or team member that possesses gusto and alacrity is curious and always upbeat in front of others will be perceived as being charismatic. Putting forward a positive attitude also infects peoples thinking and feelings and this adds to the perception of charisma. In some workplaces, where the manager has charisma there is energy, a vibe, electricity, or vibrations in the air. This is the result of the manager exuding a positivity that infects the workplace to the extent that everyone possesses it. You can demonstrate charisma by:

· Demonstrating gusto (showing great energy, enthusiasm and enjoyment when taking part in an activity)

· Being totally focused on the present, in the moment.

· Exuding positivity - the glass is always half full.

· An attitude of getting things done and that no problem is insurmountable.

8. Emotional Intelligence (EI)

Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify, assess, and control the emotions of yourself and others.

It is the ability to be able to identify and express feelings, perceive and evaluate others’ emotions and use emotions to facilitate thinking. Daniel Goleman, the author of ‘Emotional Intelligence,’ researched models from 181 different job roles from 121 companies and discovered that 67 per cent of the competencies deemed essential for effective performance were ‘emotional’ competencies. We learn, develop, and practice our emotional intelligence skills through real experiences.

· Become more self-aware by paying attention to how your emotions are affecting your decisions and actions.

· Pay attention to managing strong emotions such as excitement, anger, frustration, and distress.

· Improve your social skills by being ‘curious’, start a conversation by asking benign questions.