Part 9 – Mentoring your Team Members

This post is based on a course lesson from How to incrementally improve your Team.

Mentoring Is not just an important success factor for team-building outcomes, it is also highly recommended as a regular management practice for managing and developing your team. I firmly believe that every manager has a responsibility, a duty to develop the skills, knowledge and professional growth of each of their team members.

The Mentoring session

The purpose of the mentoring sessions is twofold. Firstly, it assists with the rollout of the team-building process and secondly, it creates a working relationship that is positive and supportive that provides you with a management tool to develop your team members to their fullest potential. The scope of the sessions should change and evolve as the needs of the team member being mentored changes.

At the start of your mentoring sessions, explain why the sessions are being held, their twofold purpose, then try to exchange background information about yourself and the mentee before you talk about anything else, take the time to get to know each other. Try to understand the team members personal situation and out of work stresses and obligations. Use your own situation as an example. Being as frank and honest as you can help build repour and encourages the mentee to do the same. You are building a working relationship here and you want to be able to quickly and easily, openly and honestly, discuss any subject, no matter how contentious or troublesome, in the future.

At subsequent sessions, the team member being mentored should be encouraged to share information about his or her career path aspirations and be given guidance, motivation, emotional support and assistance with problems. If you have a new team or new team member; at the first session, talk about becoming a High-Performance Team and the benefits.

Without a mutually understood agreement to speak freely, the relationship is unlikely to reach its full potential. Commit to honesty. Both parties should be prepared to offer frank feedback as appropriate, even if the feedback is critical. Listen and learn. Mentors, especially, need to remember that the relationship is not primarily about them. These sessions should reveal team members preferred working styles and as mentioned, professional aspirations. You are their role model, lead by example, remembering that your words and actions will create a lasting impression and will be copied.

Be careful of language; for example, never criticise anyone even when the situation warrants it. Instead, I strongly suggest that you tell them that you have an observation to make, albeit negative. The word ‘criticism’ or being perceived as being critical is negative; it turns people off; they stop listening and are unlikely to take on board what you have to say. If for example, you have made the same mistake yourself at some time or exhibited the same poor behaviour that you have ‘observed’ say so, its builds trust and reiterates that we all learn from our mistakes. Language is important. Always try to follow a negative observation with a positive one.

As the team-building process progresses, use this time to explore how the team member is adjusting, any concerns they may have and any suggestions for improvement. Work to get them to take on increased ownership of the team-building process, its outcomes and especially making new ways of working, new habits. After all, it’s for their benefit. It is important to impress on each team member how important it is to adopt, practice and make permanent the new team building ways of working. It is strongly recommended that you repeat this message every time.

Recognise that team members have individual differences in terms of needs and desires, aim to exploit their strengths and challenge them with new tasks to address weaknesses. Accept that there will be individual differences between team members, (e.g., some team members require more encouragement, some more autonomy, others firmer standards, and still others more task structure). Aim to understand their preferred working style and be prepared to address failings.

At my regular weekly mentoring sessions I always discussed:

  1. Team building progress.

  2. Current major projects.

  3. Any work issues.

  4. Staff training.

  5. Team members strengths and weaknesses and professional development needs.

Make it a priority

Try to diary at least an hour with each team member per week, especially during the team-building process. As each team member takes on more of the team-building characteristics, these sessions may become shorter or be spaced further apart. Use this time with team building and your own agenda in mind, namely that you are developing a team of professionals.

How to be a good communicator

People leadership means being an excellent communicator, ensuring that the right message reaches the right person in the right way at the right time. Communication is not a one-person show. Just doing the talking does not help; you need to concentrate on listening as well. Active listening takes considerable mental discipline and effort to do it well.

Before delivering an important message, consider:

  1. Rehearsing in your head the message you want to tell.

  2. Putting yourself in the other person’s shoes, how will they interpret the message?

  3. Is the message clear, concise and unlikely to be misinterpreted?

  4. If it is misinterpreted, how will you know and how will you back out and restate it?

  5. Check that your messages have been received by asking the team member to playback to you their understanding of what you have said.

  6. Practice active listening, that is, concentrate on what you are hearing. What is it the other person is trying to tell you? Often if someone has a difficult thing to say to you, they will disguise it, not be clear or concise, you need to be on the lookout for this.

  7. If the message (such as an employee’s termination) is sensitive or unpleasant, prepare a bulleted script for yourself to follow and stick to it.

  8. Be frank, direct, open and honest; the other person will pick this up and be reassured by it. It’s a matter of not what you have to say, but also how you say it.

  9. Look directly at the other person, that is, into their eyes. To do this and maintain a stare, look just above the bridge of their nose, between their eyes. This allows you to maintain a direct look for as long as you want. To the other person, it appears as if you are looking directly into their eyes. This is an especially effective tactic for negotiations and when delivering bad news, it gives you the upper hand.

 Next, do the following

  1. Set-up weekly team member mentoring sessions.

  2. Take the time to get to know each team member.

  3. At each mentoring session include an informal performance review, which could be as simple as saying “I think you’re doing a great job.”

  4. Assess the team members team-building progress.

  5. Assess their work performance.



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